March 7, 2013

******** Daily Gripe –  Dating Stories-

Suitor#6 Author: Revisited 

[24 hours after he initially contacted, typed exactly as messages were received]

Suitor#6 Author Yes i am a book Author and i have a book out now can i tell you about it

Me: I would prefer to hear more about you personally

Suitor#6 Author: Sure can we exchange numbers

Me [generic message, that is now saved on my phone so I do not have to keep devising a new response for such occurrences, 5 meaningless messages in]: I consider the phone a more intimate form of communication, which is great, once we have gotten to know one another.

Suitor#6 Author: oh ok cool but could u look at my work online

Me: I am here to look for someone for dating purposes, not to help promote their professional work, unless there is something I am missing in all of this…

Random Online Dating Site Participant

His profile picture is him, looking into the camera with a scowl on his face, giving the camera (or his audience) the bird (like a deer caught in headlights, I cannot look away and must proceed downward to see what the rest of his profile has in store for the desperate.

Headline reads: Single get at me (English must be his third language)

About me: Your ideal man 🙂

(and then below this after several spaces, there is just some keyboard mashing)

dfaddddddddddddsfdddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd

(It went on for lines of d’s but no need to replicate that here)

Another Random Participant

Headline reads: Open-minded Skeptic (moving on)

A third, wonderful chuckle of the night.

Intent: Actively seeking a relationship; for dating

Profile details: Have very little time for dating.

Forth Participant of the day has a profile picture of himself with a cigarette in his mouth (attractive!) Because I have asthma and I am extremely sensitive to cigarette smoke, I have selected only have non-smokers as my matches.  So I look down at his profile, in the field where you select an option and he has the following: Non-smoker.  I guess his idea and my idea of a smoker are two totally different things.  So then I think, well maybe it was a SPOOF picture to make me think.  So for fun, I glance at his other 6 photos posted. 4 of these show him actually SMOKING! Yep! I won the jackpot! I found myself a LIAR!

I personally believe if a guy on an online dating site is telling you he is a “teddy bear” he is probably trying to convince HIMSELF that he won’t hurt you in any way because he knows deep down inside, it is BOUND to happen!

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